“When the world turns upside down, the best thing to do is turn right along with it.” – Mary Poppins

Mary Poppins Returns.

Happy 2023!

One of my New Year’s resolutions (in fact my only one) was and is to get back into my blogging habit. I don’t think that I posted anything last year, but there were good reasons why, including my relationship ending and coming back to Jersey to take up a new job, packing up all my worldly goods from London and saying that everything was fine. A lot.

I’ve also been hesitant posting about my relationship ending, because I felt ashamed about it. And I thought that, in my 40s, I wouldn’t have to deal with this nonsense.

My partner had left for a job overseas, but before he left, I had noticed that I wasn’t really discussed as part of his future plans, although maybe I should have noticed that when we went to Rome for my birthday last March (amazing place, you must go) and failed to show me any affection whatsoever.

On our last day there, he advised me to “get healthy and sexy” as if he was having to visit the Vatican with a large turnip, rather than his girlfriend of three years.

I returned to London completely bewildered, got another job that didn’t suit me whilst he was away and tried to do everything that being in a new flat, with a new job, entailed. I certainly didn’t act or feel single, but when you ask someone if everything is OK and they say it is, but they’re not really present, then there’s a problem. I was fine. Everything was fine.

To cut a long story short, I received an email telling me that he had met someone else. It contained photos of them together, showing that he had flown overseas (there are a lot of air miles in this tale), met with another woman (who was wearing a ring I wouldn’t have chosen, but beggars can’t be choosers…), smiling into the camera and holding hands. They danced, they kissed, there was a banner with his name on!

I knew he was in the photos (rather than his face being cut out on to someone else’s body), because I had bought him the shorts he was wearing. The email was sent to me by the woman he had met, whose charming missive (for which I had no warning), was to “back off…we are getting married.” And if that doesn’t ruin your Sunday night, nothing will.

My first reaction was to call a male friend who does not mince his words (Thanks M). He gave me some tough words of advice and after a while, I remembered why I lived in London and ordered fast food at midnight. This helped. Sort of.

According to my now former boyfriend, he had “been online one day, when she had just popped up….” and meeting her had been “a mid life crisis”. ” As a man” he said, “sometimes you have to do these things.” I’m sure all this is true.

I don’t know what I was more disappointed about – the clash of two amazing clichés, or the fact that I had asked if anything was wrong and had been told no. I would have much preferred to have been told in person, by him, before the photos whizzed my way. I am a realist. I know that all relationships go though bad and sad times, but if I’m no longer the person for you, just tell me.

Life since my decision to end things has been interesting. It turns out that I was sadder to leave London than I was about the relationship ending in many ways. I loved my flat and the life I had there. And he still insisted in splitting the returned deposit 50:50…

So what would I like from 2023? I have a few requests for the relationship gods, who currently seem to be on strike, or very busy helping other customers.

I just want to meet someone who’s there for the difficult parts of the life as well as the easier, fabulous bits. Someone who will share the cooking, drop me off at hospital when asthma strikes, sit there whilst I talk through my mask like Darth Vader, make me a great cup of tea and be proud to be seen with me. I can promise I will do all this too.

Maybe we will even go on holiday…After all, even turnips like a mini break, and there a lot of places waiting on my bucket list.

Wish me luck, have a great 2023 and thank you for reading. As Scarlett O’Hara said, “Tomorrow is another day!” And there are a lot of tomorrows left in 2023.

The last words, however, go to our heroine, Mary Poppins. “There’s nowhere to go, but up.”